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May 29, 2008- Dealing with the Transition: Singleness to Adulthood, Marriage, and Family Base-material All Grown Up: A Gamer Comes to Grips With Adulthood 
Though this article describes some of my own fears concerning video games, (some of which
have already come to pass and I'm not even married yet!) it also brings to light the general fear I have of the notion that when family comes,
your life as you know it ends. I know this to be an exaggeration on one hand, but true on another. I've seen with my own eyes
individuals that were passionate about some hobby or interest and sort of had to "park" that interest when baby or babies came.
Some I think problems occur, with guys at least, when they either don't expect or know that "tradeoff" transition is going to occur (which leads to confusion and frustration in the marriage) or figure they can still maintain all their hobbies and interests and still devote the time their family needs - which is near impossible in a 24 hour day. I guess the crux of my frustration is cosmic in nature in that I rue how I have such strong desires for both marriage and singlehood/freedom (which is probably how many guys feel). Some would say this is a sign of immaturity… Worse yet, it seems like this conflict is what causes a lot of problems in marriages with guys trying to do their "thing" while neglecting the family. I wish I was just either all about marriage and family, or all about singleness and the open road and ever changing tide. Yet when you bring such polarized traits together, are you creating a recipe for disaster? Ugg, sleepless nights ensue… It also makes me think about our (men) strong desire for both monogamous and polygamous relationships. My heart and soul wants to be with one women for all my life but my flesh wants to sleep with every woman I see on the street (and find sexually attractive of course). "We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it." -Paul Screw Adam and Eve and the Fall and that effing snake... |
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